/co/ - Comics & Cartoons » Thread #83123741

40KiB, 600x337, flanders monkey paw.jpg

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Monkey's Paw

lupinthethird !bz9IVDZezM Wed 25 May 01:07:49 2016 No.83123741 View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>83125010 >>83126127 >>83126440 >>83126659 >>83127189 >>83127511 >>83127939 >>83130939

I wish...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:08:28 No.83123768 Report

Quoted By: >>83123893

Mom finds that apartment she's looking for tomorrow.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:10:47 No.83123893 Report

Quoted By: >>83124040

>>83123768
Granted. After a year or so, she starts getting horrible coughing fits. Finds out the apartment is crawling with some serious type of mold.

I'm sorry, anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:13:23 No.83124013 Report

Quoted By: >>83124086 >>83124149

Monkey paw threads would stop

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:14:04 No.83124040 Report

Quoted By:

>>83123893
At this point that would probably kill her.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:15:04 No.83124086 Report

Quoted By: >>83124114

>>83124013
Granted but now Stephen Universe has two generals that can't be filtered

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:15:14 No.83124091 Report

Quoted By: >>83124129 >>83127689

To have complete and utter omnipotence

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:15:56 No.83124114 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124086
Hey I thought there would be a downside.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:16:18 No.83124129 Report

Quoted By: >>83127433

>>83124091
Granted. You are usurped and killed by other lesser gods.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:16:44 No.83124149 Report

Quoted By: >>83126501

>>83124013
Monkey paw threads stop, but are replaced by some other shitpost.

The cycle never ends, anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:17:14 No.83124163 Report

Quoted By: >>83124423

I wish I were never born.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:19:01 No.83124229 Report

Quoted By: >>83124949 >>83126548

I wish I was the magic monkey paw

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:19:27 No.83124243 Report

Quoted By: >>83127521

Wish I could save her...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:23:59 No.83124423 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124163
Granted but you still have your current conscious, only that you are a sperm cell that failed to reach your mothers egg.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:35:43 No.83124872 Report

Quoted By: >>83124905

The voices in my head would stop screaming whenever I saw her.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:36:48 No.83124905 Report

Quoted By: >>83125206

>>83124872

Alright.

The voices scream 24/7, and only stop whenever you see her.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:37:48 No.83124949 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124229

You retain your consciousness and awareness as you are reposted again and again, with ever more "clever" ironic shitposts, forever.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:39:26 No.83125010 Report

Quoted By: >>83125763

>>83123741
to have a healing ability like Wolverine.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:41:22 No.83125081 Report

Quoted By: >>83125129 >>83125198 >>83126431 >>83126605 >>83131805

I wish for a turkey sandwich... on rye bread, with lettuce, and mustard, and... AND!... I don't want any zombie turkies, I don't wanna turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any more weird surprises, you GOT IT?!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:43:02 No.83125129 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125081
Granted, but you can not eat the turkey sandwich.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:44:11 No.83125164 Report

Quoted By: >>83128234

i wish my baby had never die and my to not suicide after that, and no harm to be done to them with any kind of drawback coming form a mythical paw or anything else

fuck you monkey paw i just want them to be fine, i dont care what you do to me

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:44:50 No.83125182 Report

Quoted By: >>83125796

I wish nostalgia tards (Cartoon Network, Star Wars, etc) would just shut the fuck up and learn to accept their new products. Ungrateful cunts

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:45:17 No.83125198 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125081

You only get white meat in the sandwich.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:45:23 No.83125204 Report

Quoted By: >>83125357

That Zach Snyder, joss Whedon, and Brett ratner would die in a car crash

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:45:25 No.83125206 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124905
You fucking piece of shit. There is no God. They scream on end. My children can hear it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 01:49:42 No.83125357 Report

Quoted By: >>83126581 >>83126836 >>83126880

>>83125204
granted now shamamalan, lucas and bay are making the same movies they did

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:01:34 No.83125763 Report

Quoted By: >>83125927 >>83126213

>>83125010
Granted. Even the most minor of damage to your cells cause massive cancerous growths to develop. By the end of the month, you will be a living ball od cancer unable to die

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:02:49 No.83125796 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125182
Granted, but now they won't shut up about their new products.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:06:58 No.83125927 Report

Quoted By: >>83125981 >>83126213

>>83125763
So I'm just like all of 4chan then?

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:08:38 No.83125981 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125927

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:12:34 No.83126127 Report

Quoted By:

>>83123741
For TWO HA'PENNIES

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:15:20 No.83126213 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125763
>>83125927

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:16:53 No.83126259 Report

Quoted By: >>83126353

>it's 2006
I wish for a Superman movie where he actually fights someone equal to his power.
And I also want a Justice League movie one day.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:19:34 No.83126353 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126259
can you imagine if someone did a monkey paw thread and then someone said that exact thing?

i could fucking hate that anon for the rest of my life and even mail him/her a somme glitter

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:22:01 No.83126431 Report

Quoted By: >>83126458 >>83126605

>>83125081

Sorely disappointed in all of you for not saying "Granted, but the turkey is a little dry"

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:22:12 No.83126440 Report

Quoted By: >>83126870

>>83123741
Pic related but with the addition that in the likelihood that the monkeys paw or any wish granting entity still manages to generate an outcome that is negative in total the monkey's paw or any wish granting entity will instantly be turned into another wish granting entity that will follow the rules of my claim.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:22:52 No.83126458 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126431
THE TURKEY'S A LITTLE DRY?!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:22:53 No.83126460 Report

Quoted By: >>83126558 >>83126655

I wish MLP never happened

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:24:23 No.83126501 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124149
>tfw the monkey paw is just real life accelerated

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:25:52 No.83126548 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124229
You are forced to grant wishes until you become old and bitter, causing you to twist peoples desires and ruin their lives.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:26:06 No.83126558 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126460
Granted.
But the autism and general social repulsiveness of bronies now infest your favourite fandom

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:26:38 No.83126581 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125357
Fuck it, I'm in.

Anonymous

View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO well, see ya around.jpg, 88KiB, 1158x706

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:27:30 No.83126605 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126431
>I'm disappointed in you for not making the most obvious reference that everyone and their grandmother already thought of as soon as they saw that word-for-word quote in >>83125081

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:29:12 No.83126655 Report

Quoted By: >>83126707

>>83126460

But I love Major[/spoiler:lit] League Ping-pong!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:29:16 No.83126659 Report

Quoted By: >>83126716

>>83123741
a new ghostbusters movie

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:31:14 No.83126707 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126655

Major League Ping-pong

Now the joke is ruined, well that stinks.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:31:32 No.83126716 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126659
It's your fault

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:33:38 No.83126792 Report

Quoted By: >>83126823

for chilli and sea bass

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:34:50 No.83126823 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126792
Someone get this hothead out of here.
This isn't /tv/

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:35:20 No.83126836 Report

Quoted By: >>83126891

>>83125357
I actually think that Micheal Bay has talent, but is more about making commercial success than anything else. Transformers is shit, but I really doubt it's just him on that.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:36:29 No.83126870 Report

Quoted By: >>83127315

>>83126440
Ok, but the monkey's paw had anthrax on it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:36:43 No.83126880 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125357
Shamalaman Watchmen. How is it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:36:49 No.83126891 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126836
I think he does.
He's crude as hell, but sometimes crudeness works.
Have you seen Pain and Gain?
I thought it was pretty good. Granted, I was drunk at the time, but still.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:38:00 No.83126928 Report

Quoted By:

that gays didn't exist and that /sug/ would die forever.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:38:11 No.83126933 Report

Quoted By: >>83127220

I wish I can enjoy new things…

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:45:32 No.83127189 Report

Quoted By: >>83127255

>>83123741
I WANT AN XBOX!

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:46:19 No.83127220 Report

Quoted By: >>83127253

>>83126933
Granted, you now hate everything you used to love

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:47:14 No.83127253 Report

Quoted By: >>83127347

>>83127220
Can I learn to love things I use to hate?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:47:17 No.83127255 Report

Quoted By: >>83127827

>>83127189
Why is this so faintly familiar?

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:48:57 No.83127315 Report

Quoted By:

>>83126870
Well shit, monkey's paw is truly unbeatable.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:50:03 No.83127347 Report

Quoted By:

>>83127253
Could you have just learned to live new things? Exactly...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:53:03 No.83127433 Report

Quoted By: >>83127482

>>83124129
>omnipotence
>ursuped

Someone get him a dictionary.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:54:48 No.83127482 Report

Quoted By: >>83127564 >>83127568

>>83127433
You can have unlimited power but if your'e too dumb to protect yourself, you can still be eliminated.
Omnipotence is not omniscience nor immortality.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:55:46 No.83127511 Report

Quoted By:

>>83123741
I wish that Captain America would be made more interesting than just the cape Jason Borne.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:56:21 No.83127521 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124243
There something you want to talk about anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:57:39 No.83127564 Report

Quoted By:

>>83127482
>Omnipotence is not omniscience nor immortality.

It is if you want it to be

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 02:57:56 No.83127568 Report

Quoted By:

>>83127482
om·nip·o·tence
äm?nip?d?ns/
noun
noun: omnipotence; plural noun: omnipotences

The quality of having unlimited power.

synonyms: all-powerfulness, almightiness, supremacy, preeminence, supreme power, absolute power, unlimited power; invincibility

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:02:04 No.83127689 Report

Quoted By:

>>83124091
Granted but nothing happens as your skepticism erases any proof of change from existence making you think the wish failed. Your subconscious blocks your powers due to this and you live the rest of your life like a normal human unaware of the unlimited power just in your grasp.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:04:34 No.83127755 Report

Quoted By: >>83127841

I wish I lived in the board-tan universe.

It's the only place I am familiar with.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:06:42 No.83127827 Report

Quoted By: >>83127883

>>83127255
Fairy Wish Prince by Stamper

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:07:10 No.83127841 Report

Quoted By: >>83128158

>>83127755
Granted.

You are /pol/

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:08:29 No.83127883 Report

Quoted By:

>>83127827
Thanks, mate.
I thought I heard his voice when I saw the image

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:10:14 No.83127939 Report

Quoted By: >>83128061

>>83123741
My life wasn't absolute shit and I didn't have the desire to kill myself every time I get out of bed.
I only wish to be happy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:14:25 No.83128061 Report

Quoted By: >>83128081

>>83127939
Granted.
But in doing so everyone else's life will be miserable and they'll all blame it on you.
No matter where you go people will hate you and beat you up.
Enjoy.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:15:17 No.83128081 Report

Quoted By: >>83128115

>>83128061
...how does that make him happy? Does he get erections from taking a beating now?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:16:41 No.83128115 Report

Quoted By:

>>83128081
Probably, I dunno.
I don't care, to be honest.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:18:27 No.83128158 Report

Quoted By:

>>83127841
>implying it's bad

Just few leaves here and there and it's good.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:20:44 No.83128234 Report

Quoted By: >>83129257

>>83125164
Granted.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:44:43 No.83128972 Report

Quoted By: >>83129144

I wish for the next big comic book event to upset /co/ in some way.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:49:59 No.83129144 Report

Quoted By:

>>83128972
Granted.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 03:53:35 No.83129257 Report

Quoted By:

>>83128234
thanks monkey paw, i love you
if only it was that easy to get them back

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 04:33:00 No.83130469 Report

Quoted By:

I wish for unlimited wishes in a way that will horribly backfire (or otherwise aggrieve) on me where this also applies to the wishes I will be making as a result of this wish.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 04:48:04 No.83130939 Report

Quoted By: >>83131842

>>83123741
I WISH ... that the asshats who come to /co/ just to start threads about how much they hate comics would burst into flames and only burn to the point where skin-grafts would no longer help them.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 04:50:49 No.83131016 Report

Quoted By:

I wish there were no longer monkey paws to make wishes on.

I'll take whatever consequence as long as they can no longer hurt others...

if only...

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 05:10:21 No.83131565 Report

Quoted By:

I wish for 1 billion American dollars to be legally deposited into my bank account and no negative effect can take place until the account hits zero american dollars and zero cents.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 05:19:17 No.83131805 Report

Quoted By:

>>83125081
Granted, but it has sun dried tomatoes.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 25 May 2016 05:20:50 No.83131842 Report

Quoted By:

>>83130939
Granted. /co/ is now nothing but cartoon generals and live action threads.

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