Applying the logic of your second point to your first one, we haven't seen them connect on a deeper level at all, so why should we believe it happened? I don't think Kiteman would have the mental capacity to understand/appreciate anything serious about Ivy. He'd be like a trophy husband - physically fulfilling, emotionally fulfilling at first, but the mental disconnect would have them drift apart eventually.
And of course not, neither of them have romantic interest in each other at the moment. Harley might, but it's not something she realizes yet, according to the writers. Apparently she's going to realize mid-season when she has an Arkham flashback.
I like it better this way, establishing a solid friendship first instead of making things messy with different kinds of feelings. It also provides more reasoning for why Ivy went to Kiteman - he was there for her when Harley was at her shittiest, still obsessed with Joker. Now that she's really over him, and her and Ivy reconciled, they have a much stronger relationship to evolve into something more.