/co/ - Comics & Cartoons » Thread #104488664

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 02:58:14 2018 No.104488664 View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>104488997 >>104489751 >>104489954 >>104490016 >>104490247 >>104491370 >>104491449 >>104491628 >>104494573

post times you were literally the joker
>be me
>mom says dinner's ready
>wait 5 minutes to finish my game before coming. >finally show up to the table
>mom says "make sure to eat the roast first because it's hot and it won't be good cold"
>wait until the VERY end to eat it
>look at mom with a smile when doing it

SOMEBODY STOP ME

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 02:58:57 No.104488681 Report

Quoted By:

>Order meatlovers pizza
>Take out all the meat

UPTOWN GIRL

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 03:05:14 No.104488844 Report

Quoted By: >>104490300 >>104494517

these posts are typically made in a similar format but I took a different route and did it a completely different way while simultaneously killing the thread. Lock me up and throw away the key.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 03:12:37 No.104488997 Report

Quoted By: >>104489098 >>104489177

>>104488664
>Be me
>Need to take a shit at mall
>Really, really have to go
>Wander around looking for bathroom that isn't being cleaned/occupied/being used as a makeshift hotel room for illegals/junkies/homeless
>Finally find one
>No TP in stall
>No wax paper either
>literallyohshit.jpg
>Walk over to food court
>Guts roiling, only tightly-clenched cheeks preventing explosion
>Grab napkins from table at the food court
>Permanent intestinal damage a likely possibility as seconds pass
>Ninja self into my bathroom away from food court
>Frothing sea of ass menudo ready to be unleashed
>Find my stall
>Still unoccupied
>Sit down
>Unleash burger Kraken
>Never got caught

GOMERZ RUZ AP

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 03:17:59 No.104489098 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488997

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 03:21:44 No.104489177 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488997
Top 10 Anime Antiheroes

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 04:01:57 No.104489751 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664
Seems more Brotherhood of Dada than Joker.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 04:12:47 No.104489954 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664
>opened the fridge
>saw cheese
>said "Oh look, we still have bread"
I think I'm going CrRAAzzY

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 04:16:07 No.104490016 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664
>Be me
>Epic gamer
>spot a fortnite player
>Rape him and then beat his friend with a crowbar
>"We live on a society" le epic win

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 04:27:57 No.104490247 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664
>stabbed a homeless to death in the alley
>two years since and still not caught
Somebody stop me

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 04:31:07 No.104490300 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488844
>kills the thread with digits

Dammit, Joker.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 04:38:46 No.104490433 Report

Quoted By: >>104491395

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 05:40:53 No.104491370 Report

Quoted By: >>104491943

>>104488664
>Be me
>10
>Have little brother who always wants to play with my shit
>Parents buy him plenty of toys but he ignores them and fucks around with my stuff anyway
>Looking back, I realize he probably just wanted my attention and to play together, but back then I felt nothing but seething hatred
>Parents never discipline him because he's an aspie and they're hippies
>Self esteem blah blah blah
>I shit you not, they would frame and hang up the "participation awards" he got for school activities
>One day I get home from school
>Was there late because I was in some "high school prep" program for nerds that met two days a week after normal class
>Walk into my room
>Aspie little bro got into my shit again
>Specifically my GBA shit
>No idea what he did, but it's fucked
>Console won't turn on and my pokemon sapphire cartridge is cracked
>All my beloved pokemon - my true brothers - dead and gone
>Tell parents
>They say I can't blame him because he's only seven and he's an autist
>Obviously I don't fucking agree
>No punishment
>Decide that if I want revenge, I'll have to take it myself
>Little bro - let's call him "Tommy" - only became reliably potty-trained earlier this year
>Still wets the bed sometimes
>Wait until the dead of night
>Go to bathroom and piss in a cup
>Ninja down the hall, past parents room, into Tommy's room, cup full of piss in hand
>Nearly spill the piss when I step on one of his toy cars
>Sneak over to the little shit's bed while he slumbers
>Realize there's no fucking way I'm gonna pour this piss all over him without waking him up
>Moment of inspiration
>Sometimes when Tommy has nightmares, he hides under his bed
>Pour the piss under the bed and sneak back to my room
>Next morning
>No fuss or anything
>Don't hear anything about the piss
>Realize nobody even found it
>Goddamnit, my revenge won't work if Tommy doesn't get in trouble
>That's okay, I can play the long game
>For my pokemon
(cont.)

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 05:42:23 No.104491395 Report

Quoted By:

>>104490433
Based Megatron.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 05:45:30 No.104491449 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664
>at the bar
>some cops come in
>"you re wife and unborn child are kill"
>"no"
>fall in with some bad dudes
>do some work for them
>get chased by some vigilante
>fall into acid
>get angry

Tl;dr had a bad day

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 05:47:27 No.104491487 Report

Quoted By:

>barge into 12yo sister's room without knocking
>she's doing Fortnite dances in her thong
>floss on that thot to assert dominance
>mfw she bursts into flames
WHY SO SYRIAN

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 05:56:55 No.104491628 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664
Joker is for Plebs. DOOM is for Patricians. Here's a time I acted like God Emperor Doom.
>be me
>4th grade
>athletic kid, but absolutely cannot stand team-sports
>gym class is basically "exercises and football"
>always fuck up footbal
>gym class comes, fuck up as usual
>class hottie comes to me
>"anon, it's okay if you're not good at this, you have other talents"
>places hand on my shoulder and giggles
>look her dead in the eye and start ramping up my voice
>"unhand me you simpleton; I need neither your sympathy nor your pity"
>"I am perfectly capable of anything I wish to master"
>she stands there stunned
>ball flies out and hits me in the head
>mfw
It's unironically real...

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 06:17:08 No.104491943 Report

Quoted By: >>104492137

>>104491370
>That night, I repeat the process, drenching the carpet under Tommy's bed in another nice, big cup of piss
>It smells a little musty under there
>Still, next morning, nothing
>I even ask my mom "if Tommy's doing okay" and she seems perfectly chipper
>It's not a suspicious question because 1. I'm a well-behaved, geeky little kid and 2. There's always something wrong with Tommy
>That night, I once more don the mantle of the piss-ninja, and strike again
>When I crouch down under the bed to pour my yellow vengeance, it already smells rancid
>Next day I get back from school and nobody's home
>Dad's usually still at work, but mom is almost always home
>Go looking around the house for anyone
>Check Tommy's room
>Yes
>His bed has been moved out of the way to reveal the large, vile stain that I've been adding to over the past week
>Someone obviously tried to clean it, but it's soaked straight through by now
>Mom gets home later and just says she had to take Tommy to the doctor
>Listen to her and dad talking over dinner
>Doing that thing where they think if they speak in vagueries and don't use specific names you won't figure out what they're talking about
>They bought the whole thing
>They figured Tommy was having nightmares so he was sleeping under his bed and pissing there for god knows how long
>Apparently his doctor said he should start seeing some kind of developmental therapist
>They also put him back in diapers for another year
And that's the story of how I got my little brother sent to the retard doctor. I did it for my pokemon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 06:32:09 No.104492137 Report

Quoted By:

>>104491943
That's not Joker-tier behavior, that was a true act of just, righteous vengeance. Aim for being The Spectre instead.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 08:25:57 No.104493281 Report

Quoted By:

>see a movie
>see a second movie without paying for it

CALLING THE WORLD FROM ISOLATION

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 09:09:44 No.104493733 Report

Quoted By:

>Be me
>retirement party for someone I don't know is next door
>They have Costco cake
>Sneak in and pretend to know the guy without actually talking to him so I can take 5 slices home with me on top of what I ate

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 09:19:04 No.104493830 Report

Quoted By:

>Be me, 14 yo Ausfag
>School camp in Sydney
>Scavenger hunt type thing
>8 teams, sharing shit but doing things in a different order/pace
>One thing is instructions for a key part on a piece of paper taped to a tree
>Team does them
>Supposed to put it back on tree
>Throw the paper into Sydney harbour
>Cackle like a retard for hours, the next team never made it back until like 9pm

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 03 Dec 2018 10:45:44 No.104494517 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488844
Thread should have ended here, the Joker already showed up.

0 Mon 03 Dec 2018 10:57:04 No.104494573 Report

Quoted By:

>>104488664

always

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