desu this still bothers me
can't be rich and go to a high-status position or do most of the things i'd like to do like flying a glider because lol shit poor background, and even though i try to make things better deep down i know i just didn't win the lottery so lol better luck next life (i fucking hope not)
can't give up on social status and just be a furry and spend all day on the internet making internet friends in a reviled community that will accept anyone because i've got no money and my love of animals doesn't actually count for shit so i'll just be ignored by the other furries, since it turns out "we accept anyone" is in the narrow "we won't throw you out" sense rather than the open-and-honest jehovas witness "we'll make an effort to integrate you" sense.
at least i'll die i suppose, so there is always a silver lining. even if it is a fucking bullet coming through my wall from a drug-deal gone wrong in the apartment next door.