Quoted By:
Hello, my name is professor Blazkowicz, and I hate every single one of you. Your education means nothing to me. If you hope to pass my class, which you won't because you'll never be as smart as me, be sure to follow this advice to the letter.
1) Let your understanding of the subject rest entirely in my hands
Why would you go out of your way to attempt to learn something under your own power? You need not take the time to adapt your world view to accommodate the philosophy of this course. That's what I, the man who hates you, am here for.
2) Give up
Since you’re going to fail anyway, because are not as smart as me, it doesn’t even make sense for you to go to the trouble. Elect not to attend class, avoid buying the text book, Google the answers, use Chegg; your education means nothing to me. It makes no sense to make time for homework assigned by me, the man who hates you. If your fellows break this solidarity, it must be because they are obsessive nerds with nothing better to do.
3) Cram
If your anxiety gets the better of you and you decide at the beginning of exam week that you have a chance to pass, you don’t because you are not as smart as me. Feel free to come to my office hours, as if I, the man who hates you, will waste countless hours of my already busy day tirelessly working with you to help you learn what you should have learned at the beginning of class when I taught it.
4) Blame me for your failing grade
If you fail, which you will because you will never be as smart as me, be sure to give me a bad evaluation. That will both make up for your permanently damaged grade point average and help you to sleep at night. Having left your entire understanding of the subject to me, I, the man who hates you, am to blame for your ignorance. The fact that some have aced my course, though their education means nothing to me, is irrelevant.
Following all of these steps is a guaranteed path to success in this course.
