>>3803262God tier upshot.
The other one has very good facial part, but it's like you stopped caring once you had it done and had to move on to the cranial part. The silhouette there is very undefined, almost circular.
What helps me is to segment the forehead into lines and trail them off to the back of the head, then connect them into planes. If you've done Scott Robertson's mirroring curve exercises it should be easy.
Just do this a couple times and you can skip this whole step and just draw the outline.
