I would lie if I say I wasn't expecting one of these.>>3326014
Yeah I'm assisting CBT too but I started a few months ago and things are not going as fast as I wish they did.
Before getting diagnosed with this I got misdiagnose with like 3 very different but equally as shitty things over the years, all of them treatable but equally as stigmatized and eventually that started wearing off the little faith I had in myself and the faith I had in therapy and professionals in general.
I'm just really really tired of all this.
I truly wish I still had an ounce of hope in my system, but right now I'm like still trying to accept that maybe this one diagnose is the real deal. Maybe. I mean I certainly fit more of the criteria in autism that I did with bipolarity...>You could try joining a group with other people that have your same interests, then you have some common ground
That's the thing, I just cannot speak to people anymore even about things I like. I feel like I just cannot match their level of enthusiasm and it only makes me feel like I drag people down to the same hole I am by just being my boring ass self, I know how discouraging is to be happy about something and get just a lukewarm
I truly don't want to accidentally act shitty, I know I can get angsty and hostile when I get overwhelmed and I just don't want to hurt people by accident either, I've done it when I was younger and I'm still regretting it.
Is always difficult to reply to well meaning and thoughtful posts like this, I actually barely write my posts here so is difficult. English is not my first language too so my grammar may get kinda messy at times. Anyways, I'm sorry.