In all seriousness, there was an early physicist name Ritz who developed an interesting ballistic model of light:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ritz_ballistic_theoryIn ballistic theories, the velocities of the source and observer effect the relative speed of light.
There was another physicist (Stefan Marinov) who believed that light traveled similar to the way sound travels in the atmosphere--constant, but only with respect to a specific inertial frame.
So for example, in the absolute frame of the universe (we'll call it the Marinov frame), light appears constant from all directions (the same way the speed of sound is constant unless we're traveling in a very fast vehicle). But, since the Earth is presumably not in the Marinov frame but moving at some velocity with respect to it, we should be able to detect a difference in speed between light traveling from one direction vs another (in technical terms, an anisotropy).
Marinov designed some shutter experiments to test his theory and claimed to be able to measure this anisotropy and determine the Earth's velocity with respect to the Marinov frame. His work was basically ignored though, and he eventually committed suicide.
