>>12651415Your problem is you are locked in the worldview of the free willist, where your will is something at odds with being. To realize free will doesnt exist is not losing something as you imagine, rather it is realizing that your thoughts and desires are derived through the 'thinking' of the motions of causation of the entire universe. The universe itself becomes your brain.
The specter of your will is just like your autonomic nervous system, its a layer of things taking place, and an awareness.
If you ever sit there deliberating something trying to decide what to do, you would never have come to a different conclusion no matter how many times this occurred in different identical universes.
You are just stubborn and instinctively want to resist the idea of being told what to do, and the idea that you can not defy what was always going to be your will by your own will makes you angry.
