I can not into QFT

No.12617752 ViewReplyOriginalReport
I already graduated. I use physics in my hobbies and at my official job. I sometimes try to understand modern physics but i reach a wall of understanding around 1930. The Dirac equation is about as far as i get it. I never took a formal class in QFT, i dont have buddies to debate theory with, the books go fast, dont have examples and seem to have been written as an exercise of vanity than as pedagogical tools.
Im not going to fake my way through Feynman diagrams nor have an opinion on quantum gravity or strings and assorted meme theories if i dont understand the QED Lagrangian. So be it.