>>12493252Unironically this. You can call me "Mr Ezycrap", welcome to my blog.
All my life I never understood how people could spend so long taking a crap or how they used so much toilet paper. Me, I go in, sit, literally take less than a minute to do a nice clean fresh crap that slides right out with a minimum of effort and a minimum of toilet paper wiping afterwards. Hell, most of the time I wouldn't even use any toilet paper because there was NOTHING to wipe away. You could eat breakfast off my arsehole most days.
Then a couple of years ago I got real sick with a stomach complaint brought on by food poisoning. Made the mistake of going to a restaurant with friends and eating Indian. In hospital for a few days. They stuffed me solid with drugs and antibiotics and other shit.
Got over that fine but I came out having real hard lumpy shits ( as opposed to the rice water shits when I was sick ). It could take me 10 to 20 minutes to take a shit. A painful messy shit at that. Often it would get pinched off at the anus, making a fucking mess. I would have to wipe several times. I realized then that this was what shitting was like for many people just as a normal daily occurrence during their lives. Man, that must suck.
Anyway, after eating healthy again, with lots of probiotic yogurt to restore my gut bacteria, I returned to my usual easy crap ways. Thank God for that!
