bro math majors literally are just like "parabolic function" and expect people to be impressed by that? they want a medal? congratulations?

oh you managed to identify a parabolic function? modelled it in physical simulation? oh? tell me more, please, this is just so fascinating. yes please tell me more about how you can use numbers and letters that literally make no sense to describe something REAL, like a football being thrown. yes how fascinating. you can really use this to find eggs in a store that you need for a cake? really? That's true bro? how about you just, like, use your fingers? like literally every other functioning adult male in the world?

"e-ex-exponential curve" hahaa yeah just shut up, this is exponential cringe bro, but i didn't even have to become a math major to figure that out. what's next? you gonna derive? you gonna integrate? how about you find the area under your mom's curve, I'm sure it approaches infinity. you ask me if I know how to integrate? yeah I know how to integrate. integrate my fist with your liver. What's the matter? you gonna calculate the acceleration of my fist towards you? how about to find the jerk too? i'm sure you'll be able to calculate the resultant force of my fist against you