I was wondering where you could buy a machine that generates this special oxygen, that makes you smarter.

There's this thing out there called oxygen therapy, now I don't know the details, but apparently they have special oxygen machines that emanate special oxygen that raises your neuron count, your nerve growth factor, brain derived neurotrophic factor, neurogenesis, etc... where can I get that special oxygen?

I'd like to get these one use super ultra mega oxygen packets that I can shoot down my throat for a quick burst of mental clarity in tight situations.