>Be me
>Enroll to physics because why not.
>First semester: Ok, Highschool classes.
>Second Semester
>had to choose one optative
>Choose astrophysics because why not.
>Teacher show us this Image https://www.spacetelescope.org/images/heic1502a/zoomable/
>Peed myself a little bit (literally).
>Existential crisis kicks in.
>Start talking about how insignificant we are, we are nothing, dahdah.
>heart rate prolly arround 120
>start trying to imagine how big Infinity is comparing it to Big numbers(ik how dumb it is)
>think about what happens after death
>thinking about what does nothing feels like
>imagining how an infinite amount of time can pass in 0 seconds (death and conciousness)
>Imagining what will happen after Heat Death of the Universe
>Derealization, Nausea, Fear; all check
>Go home
>Start watching Size comparisons in youtube and those nihilistic "I F-ing love science" type of videos
>Get lost, no motivation, don't want to live but don't want to die because I'm afraid of what >>11863297 asked.
I'M SO FUCKING MAD, All of this was cool in my 12 year old mind. Why am I such a pussy? why can't I ignore shit and be Amazed by the stars like /sfg/Chads?.
HOW CAN I FIX THIS SHIT????
Could've gotten in CS instead, but my fucking Ego had to enroll me to a "hard" subject to get praised by "normal people". I hate myself
>Enroll to physics because why not.
>First semester: Ok, Highschool classes.
>Second Semester
>had to choose one optative
>Choose astrophysics because why not.
>Teacher show us this Image https://www.spacetelescope.org/images/heic1502a/zoomable/
>Peed myself a little bit (literally).
>Existential crisis kicks in.
>Start talking about how insignificant we are, we are nothing, dahdah.
>heart rate prolly arround 120
>start trying to imagine how big Infinity is comparing it to Big numbers(ik how dumb it is)
>think about what happens after death
>thinking about what does nothing feels like
>imagining how an infinite amount of time can pass in 0 seconds (death and conciousness)
>Imagining what will happen after Heat Death of the Universe
>Derealization, Nausea, Fear; all check
>Go home
>Start watching Size comparisons in youtube and those nihilistic "I F-ing love science" type of videos
>Get lost, no motivation, don't want to live but don't want to die because I'm afraid of what >>11863297 asked.
I'M SO FUCKING MAD, All of this was cool in my 12 year old mind. Why am I such a pussy? why can't I ignore shit and be Amazed by the stars like /sfg/Chads?.
HOW CAN I FIX THIS SHIT????
Could've gotten in CS instead, but my fucking Ego had to enroll me to a "hard" subject to get praised by "normal people". I hate myself
