>>11841682It's difficult to tell you what you should do. If you really want to have strong conceptual foundations, you're going to have to give up on "understanding logic" or "understanding math". There's a switch in attitude when you really take responsibility over your own study.
When you're studying something you don't understand, you're doing it for social reasons, like being able to show off that you know it, or getting good grades, or being able to participate in discussions, or even just being able to understand what others are talking about.
You cannot possibly study something that you do not understand because you want to understand it. When you fundamentally do not know what the object of your study really is, you cannot have an actual interest and desire to understand it. You would have to know what it is you're studying in order to know that it's not boring to you, and that you desire understanding it.
If you do not understand what math is, you have to stop trying to understand math. If you do not understand what logic is, you have to stop trying to understand logic. You are forcing yourself, and destroying your own love of learning. For all you know, math and logic are just some academic bullshit. Why not give up on it?
When I asked myself this question, I found out that I really didn't mind forgetting about math or logic, but there was one aspect of math that I would feel bad about ignoring, and that's the ability to calculate things. So I set aside all the "mysterious" aspects of math that I no longer cared about, and started studying how and why calculation works. And calculation was not as unfamiliar to me as the mythological "mathematics" that I had built up in my head. I knew what I wanted to get out of calculations, and I knew why they are useful, and how they could help me. When you're studying something that you already understand, you have your own agenda.
