So I've thought about adopting if necessary and what risk we're taking on when doing so. When you have your own children, there's a lot more going on than just the breeding. Your presumably picked your partner off a variety of desirable traits, not just looks wise, but personality as well. Positive personality traits are not just learned, they're a part of human nature to boot. Then you have your own traits which you're aware of and can anticipate, some people deliberately decide to not reproduce due to a mental illness or some other serious and heritable malady, that's totally valid. When you have a kid it isn't a really big dice roll, you've done the sexual selection process and set things up in such a way as to maximize your possibility of success with your child. Not only that, you've positively contributed to the overall gene pool if you actually did your due diligence, avoided bad partners, and picked a good one.
When you adopt, you're willingly taking on chaos. The child could have come from any manner of parental combinations, many of them commonly mentally ill or deficient. As it stands shit parents tend to produce orphans at a much higher clip, so it may even be expected. And not only this, but they tend to be damaged by rough childhoods if they're older. There's a solid chance that they will be a basket case for the entirety of their life and you will be responsible for that. There's a solid chance that they will even come to resent you despite all of the love and charity you've blessed them with, it's a well known phenomenon that there comes a point in an adopted child's life where they start branching back out towards their biological family and feeling distant from the adoptive parents. Imagine the devastation you would feel after pouring years and years of your time and heart into a child only for them to turn on you, in any degree, once they became cognizant adults.
