I've never kissed, held hands with one, let alone talked to a girl; Never even texted one. Could this have harmed my brain permanently in the physiological or psychological sense? Has my brain wiring gotten fucked? Could I have maybe lost a few IQ points because I've never felt a genuine connection to someone? I have vivid dreams of talking to and interacting with beautiful girls all the time. It's like my brain is allocating more resources to being able to simulate love. Also, I'm ashamed to admit this, but it must be done for science; Whenever I try to fall asleep, I always hug my pillow and pretend there is a beautiful girl in front of me.

Realistically, how much could I benefit from having a girlfriend? I feel like my cortisol levels would instantly go down, just like they go down when I'm hugging my pillow. This would probably correspond to some IQ increases.