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How do you cope with your existence?

No.11513553 ViewReplyOriginalReport
We are biochemical computers, encoded as genes to have attributes and traits. Our brain is physical, it holds instances of competing thoughts and desires, and what I think I am is basically a computer which booted up in ram and can die at any time. The hardware is my physical limit. The instances that I boot up in are my waking times, and I have no idea if I did the things I did or just think I did and was thrown in here like a boltzmann brain. The most insane idea I have is that I would be completely different if I had a different childhood different height or race, and if we can wipe the mind of someone by understanding neurology more, that person could have traits and attributes, like a computer's files that are just copied onto them. That seems to be realistic, although probably primitive in our lifetimes. https://www.smithsonianmag.com/innovation/meet-two-scientists-who-implanted-false-memory-mouse-180953045/
I don't know what "I" am anymore. Is experience just placebo or implanted thoughts, and implanted by what?
I've been thinking about death a lot, I am terrified of it after taking mushrooms and I want to live. But I also don't want the world to change, I remember one person who lived very long saying he was looking forward to dying because the world had changed and he knew nobody. How do you cope scientists?