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you're asking for answers to a few complicated questions.
to your first, think more. think more about the choices you make and why you make them, why does any of it matter? think of things on a much smaller level and break it down so you understand it--afterwords just move on.
second, retaining more knowledge requires practice doing something correctly consistently enough so you don't have to walk yourself through the rigor of proving each shortcut you make through the process is correct.
three, keeping stress at bay is near impossible once you lose the reigns on the horse you're currently riding. once you lose control, you need to let some things go and just take the loss like an adult. so how do you not get to that point? simply take things one step at a time. have a big assignment due in a week? start working on it now, gauge your progress and plan accordingly--plan as in, judge how much time it'll take you to do something and then anticipate that you won't be able to stick to the schedule. you need to take it easy at first before dedicating yourself to a strict schedule.
best of luck.