>>3112065I had some twisted version of it which I regret to this day. Buckle in, this is a shit ride.
There was a really shy boy in our class who I mostly ignored until I turned 9, like the textbook outcast victim type. Some of my asshole friends bullied him regularly because they knew he wouldn't tattle (guess they assumed he was mute).
I got into a pointless fight with my usual group of friends and just decided to show them how little that fazed me by befriending shy boy.
Only we actually did become best friends and he opened up to me (but only when we were alone, still mute and petrified around anyone else, even his family). His parents thanked me all the time for being so nice to him like he didn't deserve being treated with any kind of respect. I guess hearing that from several sides in combination with his clinginess got to my head.
Around 13 I started doing cruel things out of dumb, morbid, hormone driven, teenage curiosity. Making him jealous by ignoring him while talking to other classmates or telling him what girls I wanted to get on with (even thought I had 0 interest). And when I saw how scared he was of being left behind I used that to manipulate him into doing whatever sadistic shit I came up with. After some tamer stuff it got to making him swallow my spit, shoving his sister's tampons up his butt, during sleepovers I'd just lie on him and pretend to fall asleep while he's being crushed. Don't even think it was sexual.
How I could do this to somebody I genuinely liked is beyond me. Worst part, he forgave me without hesitation after I grew out of that "phase". Thinking back, I'm pretty sure he actually like liked me, if only because he thought there wasn't anyone else out there who'd spare him attention.
A couple of years later my family moved to another city. We stayed in contact with letters, mails and visited a few times but he got into a heavy depression and then I got sick too and it just broke off there. Can't find him on fb or anywhere...
