OVER 130 ALIENS WERE DETECTED YESTERDAY.

PUTIN IS A CONTROLLED OPPOSITION TRYING TO GET THE ALIENS TO INTERVENE BUT THEY WONT BUDGE.

THE ALIENS DONT APPEAR TO GIVE A CRAP

THEY DRIVE A SPACE SHIP SHAPED LIKE UN TICTAC THEY DONT FOLLOW YOUR SHITTY LAWS OF OHYSICS DEY DISBOEY