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if it makes you feel any better just remember none of it matters, statistically speaking you only have a few decades left alive, then you will be gone and so will all of your failures and achievements, just gone in the blink of an eye. don't worry too much and focus on enjoying each day instead, you don't owe anyone anything, we're all heading the same way, we're all going to die inevitably and all of our proud achievements will have meant nothing in the end, it's all one big distraction to keep us busy enough to not think about stuff like this.
