>>13790836Well I know as an AGP I felt ashamed of myself in my early teens because seeing women naked didn't turn me on and I didn't find the idea of having sex with women to be arousing and I found the idea of being a woman having sex with men to be very arousing, when you grow up in a homophobic environment without knowing what AGP actually is you soon start to become scared that you're gay and at least it feels very gay masturbating to fantasies about having a female body and having sex with men and there's shame associated with that and self hate, I don't think it has anything to do with thinking you're cis or trans
I felt like a fetishist throughout my entire teens, I felt dirty and my sexuality tormented me, I used to pray at night that I'd become normal again and just be like a normal boy (around 12-13), I tried to force myself to watch normal heterosexual porn and self insert as the man in order to cure myself multiple times but it just left me feeling far worse ultimately
I tried to do nofap multiple times and usually went about a month at most because I was going through puberty and nofap was very difficult at the time
Meanwhile I was bullied about being a 'faggot' at school and my dad was convinced I was gay and used to go on rants at me when he was drunk about what a faggot I was and how disappointed he was in me and that I disgusted him
