Hello /sci/

I believe this is the first time I've ever posted on this board. I've studied philosophy and history intensely for years, but I'm aware that my mathematical knowledge stops at an english gsce level, and I'm extremely rusty.

From what I've read of the pythagoreans, I increasingly think this is a severe deficiency. I cannot really comprehend the reality of the universe without a grounding in mathematics. I despise the seperation between the humanities and science increasingly. I'm ashamed that it's led me to a vast knowledge in one sole area, and nothing for all the rest, except a paltry knowledge of biology via psychology.

My request is a simple one - how should I begin to truly sudy mathematics? Any and all recommendations would be deeply appreciated.