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I finally dropped out of college today.
I simply can't waste my time anymore. I have an IQ of 104 and it's clear that this single number is everything in life.
I'm so sad because I really didn't want to drop out. Finishing college was my dream. I wanted to get a PHD in math, like my father. I seriously love school so much and I don't know what else I'd really want to do.
You might say the issue is with my work ethic. But the opposite is true. I have always worked hard, and got good high school grades/ standardized testing scores from hard work. I got into a good college and I was planning to major in math & cs.
I have only managed to get through my prerequisite college classes, with Bs and Cs.
I have never been able to actually understand any of the concepts I've tried to learn. All of the progress I've made in classes has just been memorizing what I have to do and copying it onto a test. Basically, all work ethic and no actual IQ/ understanding of the material.
When I look at the upper level classwork for my major, I realize how futile this struggle is. My method of memorizing and copying won't work anymore since those classes require independent thought.
When i sit down and study, I literally can't understand the material. It feels cruel, since I'm so close to my goals and dreams but I can't have them because of the way I was born.
I finally dropped out of college today.
I simply can't waste my time anymore. I have an IQ of 104 and it's clear that this single number is everything in life.
I'm so sad because I really didn't want to drop out. Finishing college was my dream. I wanted to get a PHD in math, like my father. I seriously love school so much and I don't know what else I'd really want to do.
You might say the issue is with my work ethic. But the opposite is true. I have always worked hard, and got good high school grades/ standardized testing scores from hard work. I got into a good college and I was planning to major in math & cs.
I have only managed to get through my prerequisite college classes, with Bs and Cs.
I have never been able to actually understand any of the concepts I've tried to learn. All of the progress I've made in classes has just been memorizing what I have to do and copying it onto a test. Basically, all work ethic and no actual IQ/ understanding of the material.
When I look at the upper level classwork for my major, I realize how futile this struggle is. My method of memorizing and copying won't work anymore since those classes require independent thought.
When i sit down and study, I literally can't understand the material. It feels cruel, since I'm so close to my goals and dreams but I can't have them because of the way I was born.
