I grew up in Scotland, a small town of junkies in Lanarkshire. The school I went to looked like an abandoned hospital and most of my family were recovering from drug addiction and had severe mental problems. I've inherited negative traits from my mother's side, my grandmother in particular, and some from my father's side too who I believe is known to have some form of learning deficiency running in the family. I dropped out since there wasn't much going for me and I haven't done much since, I work as a cashier. I feel like shit for being so ignorant towards how the world works but I feel as if there isn't much I can do. The world to me is just this confusing mess of random events with no meaning behind them. I can't even do my times tables. I feel a sense of dread and worthlessness all the time, like there is no point to it all. I know you all are smart so I was hoping that you could help me. Is there any real purpose to it all? Is it bad to be stupid? What can I do to improve?