/sci/ I’m in a tough spot, and I need some help.
Im nearing 10 years on a weird journey of mine. A woman inspired me to do so much, to go to college, to get healthy, all this wonderful shit. She left my life around 5 or 6 years ago but I can’t move without her. Nobody mentally stimulates me like her. A spiritual connection almost. She called it fate like, I can remember every detail of the nights we spent, I can remember everything she wore, and how she smelled. She means everything to me. I said to my friends I would wait until my death for her, and ten years later my luck is just as good. My lungs aren’t doing so hot, and she’s still gone. And all the friends I really did have, have all gotten married, or are just not listening to this story after so long anymore. Do I go to her? She had blocked me, but I’ve changed so much from the bad boy she knew. I dont care if I die really, I just want the closure. I want her to know that there wasn’t a single night I didn’t think about her, there was no remedy or substitute for what she did to me, it’s all perfectly scientific, but I can’t explain why ten years later it still hurts to not have her here. It angers me, the work, the countless hours of work I’ve done, all for her, all this growth and progress. I could say I did it to feel better or whatever shit, but I belong to her. I just always did, her smile, man. Do I Big Boss it, and tell her it all anyway, just one more time, or should I leave this be and accept my possible demise regardless of my last minute feelings? It’s been in my head every day, for almost 10 years..
Im nearing 10 years on a weird journey of mine. A woman inspired me to do so much, to go to college, to get healthy, all this wonderful shit. She left my life around 5 or 6 years ago but I can’t move without her. Nobody mentally stimulates me like her. A spiritual connection almost. She called it fate like, I can remember every detail of the nights we spent, I can remember everything she wore, and how she smelled. She means everything to me. I said to my friends I would wait until my death for her, and ten years later my luck is just as good. My lungs aren’t doing so hot, and she’s still gone. And all the friends I really did have, have all gotten married, or are just not listening to this story after so long anymore. Do I go to her? She had blocked me, but I’ve changed so much from the bad boy she knew. I dont care if I die really, I just want the closure. I want her to know that there wasn’t a single night I didn’t think about her, there was no remedy or substitute for what she did to me, it’s all perfectly scientific, but I can’t explain why ten years later it still hurts to not have her here. It angers me, the work, the countless hours of work I’ve done, all for her, all this growth and progress. I could say I did it to feel better or whatever shit, but I belong to her. I just always did, her smile, man. Do I Big Boss it, and tell her it all anyway, just one more time, or should I leave this be and accept my possible demise regardless of my last minute feelings? It’s been in my head every day, for almost 10 years..
