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I wake up in the morning and the first thing I remember is that I have my goddamn doctorate in mathematics, this results in an immediate rush of endorphins and testosterone which will last for the rest of the day. I then get to work writing down the proofs to the theorems that I solved in my head last night. After that I fuck my 10/10 wife while thinking about my research. I then leave without eating breakfast since I no longer require sustenance. Next follows morning lectures gracing plebs with some invaluable insight into my mind and its firm grasp on the most important field of study in human history. The rest of the day I spend developing various mathematical structures on blackboards, the results of which will be applied to curing all cancers and building thermodynamically efficient cold fusion reactors. As the day winds down I ponder my surreal existence, I have to dig up my degree to remind myself of the reality that I do in fact have a PhD in mathematics. Finally I fall asleep holding my doctorate and 300k salary slip in my arms.

And then I do it all again.