No.3891994 ViewReplyOriginalReport
i head to sleep with the lingering thought that he will never be real.

perhaps i may dream of him, legitimately fantasize about us, perhaps.

what is most likely to happen is that i die weak and old, not too much different than the state i’m in, except younger. with nobody next to me, except the figment of imagination i’ve held on to so dearly all of my life.

or perhaps i find an unlucky soul that looks and acts like the man within my dreams. willing to stoop as low as to me, blessing me with my wish. being with him forever.

more likely the former. but i cannot stop thinking about the latter.