>>4705863>my lack of fundamentals. This is the hardest part that everyone must go through so hang in there.
My best advice here is divide your drawing time into parts, and keep 2 main objectives.
Dedicate some of your days in the week to do studies, and the other days for free draw.
Do a chunk of studies then relax yourselves with free draw days to refresh. Keep your studies consistent too, if you are self teaching I recommend that you stick to one objective first then add in one or two more half a year in.
For example, if you're committing yourself to study anatomy. Then you'll set yourself 1-3 months of doing that, starting from figure fundies to gesture, to humanization then to muscle studies. After that you can at least gain enough intuition, you'll start on another objective on the side. It could be coloring, perspective, etc.
As for your free draw days, you should try to mimic art from other artist that you like. BUT try not to copy it exactly, apply your studies when you copy them. Be conscious of what you copy until it become second nature. The point is that you're still learning passively, letting your brain adjust and apply itself without relying on a guide book. This is how you also develop style too, so you should try to imitate your favorite artist and combine them to your own.
I too dream of becoming a mangaka or comic artist in this, and I havent given up hope, just taking it more realistically this time. You too should try your best. You have a story you eagerly want to tell through your manga, so don't bottle it. Best wishes to you anon.
