>>90092086Do you know what it's like to have nothing, Spongebob?
My parents were bottom feeders. Their parents were bottom feeders. Hell, whatever crawled out of the primordial ooze and eventually gave birth to the whole Star clan was probably the world's first fucking bottom feeder.
Do you want to know what my father got me for my eighth birthday? It was a rock. I remember it so vividly. Every hole, every chip, every crag in its face. I looked up at him and I asked him...
I said "what's this, dad?"
And he just laughed. He laughed for what seemed like an hour. And he looked me in the eyes and he said to me: "It's all you'll ever have in this world, son."
I had no idea what he meant. Not until it no longer mattered, anyway. Spongebob, when you look at me, what do you see? You see a friend? You see an idiot accomplice? I see less than that. I am a 35 year old starfish. I've never had a job I could hold down for more than 11 minutes. I've never had anyone's respect or admiration.
I've never had a fucking woman, Spongebob! Do you have any idea what that's like? Waking up every day in your cold, hard bed and realising all too soon that nothing's changed: that even your sweetest dreams couldn't detract from the fact that you're desperately, hopelessly alone? You think I haven't tried? Oh, I've tried. But every time I see the scorn or the disgust on their soft, perfect faces, I just want to hurt someone. I want to kill someone! And with each passing day I'm starting to realise that that someone is probably me!
Knowing you, it kept me busy. Kept me comfortably numb. All the jellyfishing and fucking with Squidward: best years of my god forsaken life. But life ends. And we as sapient creatures are cursed with an awareness of our own insignificance.
I'm the insignificant among insignificants, Spongebob. I'm the the dirt beneath the dirt. And you want to begrudge me this? This one thing? Go fuck yourself, Spongebob. It's all funny. And we're just funny looking.
