Well, I can't invent anything, I'm not friends with billionaires or geniuses, I don't have ties to hugely successful megacorporations, and I don't have a motive.
The only thing going for me is my waning /fit/ build from my shotput days and my fondness for HEMA and boffer swords.
...Shit, I'd be the second lieutenant to some incompetent D-list villain at most. The most I could hope for would be to be redeemed and turned into a recurring anti-hero, or to be the voice-of-reason for an otherwise unreasonable villain. Or, in 10 years, some poor schmuck who couldn't afford the legal rights to anyone better would have to bury me out of the backyard and turn me into a character worth gushing over.
I like the last option the best. At the very least, someone will draw very shitty, very bizarre fanart of me being shipped with one of the more successful heroes or villains in this universe.
I just want to be loved relevant