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This was answered already in one of the behind-the-scenes featurettes on the original Spider-Man DVD. The infamous "slapjacks" scene may have been left on the cutting room floor, but the fact that Stan Lee personally okayed it makes it canon IMO. I originally thought Raimi took it too far by having Ben backhand May after burning the wheatcakes, but if Stan the Man gave the thumbs up then who am I to judge?
