Ok so serious criticisms.
The voice acting sounds like it was recorded in a studio. It's not mixed well. It's too loud and doesn't sound like it's actually in a natural room.
In the first part, the blond girl's lines match up with her mouth flaps, but there's a clip where they don't sync up at ALL and there's no recognizable transition between where she's talking IN the scene and talking OVER the scene.
There's some serious flash shortcuts going on with the facial expressions. Eyes and mouths pasted over the face doesn't work with how expressive they're trying to be. Especially at 0:54, you can just see his facial features slide across his face and it looks incredibly cheap.
Swearing isn't cool. This isn't gritty enough to warrant swearing. Regardless of what she's trying to do, it looks and feels like a PG setting and anything in R territory just feels shoehorned in for edge factor.