>>94758411>"C'mon Anon! Give me a piggie back ride."
No.>"Annooooonnn! Can you carry me then??"
No.>"How about... Letting me stand on the tops of your shoes and walking with me?"
NO!>"Ok, FINE! Can you at least hold my hand?"
Dear GOD no! >"What's wrong with you Anon? I thought this was our first date."
You realize I'm ten years older than you, right?>"So? Who cares, big guy, look at that happy couple over there. She kissed him and nobody is blinking an eye!"
That's a father and daughter Star...>"ooooohhhhhh... hahaaa. Oops"
Ooops what...?>"Uhh! Nothing! Nothing at all! I totally didn't register our names at that kiosk over there or anything! HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAA"
Which kiosk? There's like twenty of them.>"Oh ya knowwww. The one where they announce happy couples over the loud speaker for like, ten bucks?"
You didn't...>"Uhhhh... we should leave. Like right now. Here, take my hand, we're scissoring out of-"
"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! IT'S THE TOP OF THE HOUR, AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS! ITS TIME TO HONOR ANOTHER LOVELY COUPLE! THIS TIME IT'S A FINE YOUNG GENTLEMAN NAMED ANON AND HIS NEW GIRLFRIEND, STAR BUTTERFLY! LET'S GIVE A ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR THIS CUTE COUPLE, AND WISH THEM GOOD LUCK ON THEIR NEW JOURNEY... OF LOVE! Uhh... Well, ladies and gentlemen, lets calm down now. This is 2017, we shouldn't judge them. NO NO! DO NOT START TO FORM A MOB AROUND THEM. PLEASE REFRAIN FROM SURROUNDING THEM IN ANGER. LETS BE CIVIL HERE EVERYONE!">"Uhhhhh... Anon?"
Wait! WAIT! Its just a misunderstanding see? This is my c-c-cousin everyone! It was just a p-practical joke? She's just pranking! We're uh, filming a video? No need to brandish weapons ok? Put down that pipe lady!>"ANON!"
CAN WE GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE ALREADY? THESE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO TEAR ME LIMB FROM LIMB!>"ANON!"
WHAT NOW!? Where the hell are your sci->"Hahaaaaaaaaa, funny story about that... I forgot my scissors at home?"
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! WHY DOES SHIT LIKE THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME!