>wake up in the morning in a cold sweat
>i step outside, i hear him coming
>quickly i pull my clothing off my body
>here he comes
>with my balls firmly placed on the ridge of my rooftop spiderman shoots his web and with his masterful force pulls tightly and swings.
>the cameras i set up the night prior go off
>spiderman is now a wanted sex offender
>be J. Jonah Jameson jr.