OG- Kirk gets his dick wet, Spock ruins shit because wasting time on waifu is illogical.
TNG- Picard waxes philosophical about the nature of love, Riker gets his dick wet, Worf scoffs calls them all weak and then gets btfo, Diana either bitches or gets kinky not sure which, Crusher definitely bitches, Data fixes shit despite Geordi's protests.
DS9 - Worf scoffs and calls them all weak but does not get btfo, Sisko tries to think of a way to weaponize the waifu
Voyager- Harry Kim gets fucked (not laid, fucked. Up the ass), depending on where we are in the series Tom either assures his wife he's loyal or the two of them try to out slut each other in some perverse competition to prove who gives less of a shit about the other, Chaokatay gets his dick wet, Tuvok tries to ruin shit like Spock but is ineffective, The Docs reaction depends on where we are in the series, Janeway goes ballistic and commits genocide against an unrelated alien species trying to solve the waifu issue.
Enterprise- I don't even fucking know man, shits too all over the place to figure out
STD- Don't know don't care that shit ain't canon.